Finding My Husband

85 men. 10 years. A lot of first dates. And still, one surprisingly difficult question: Do I actually like him?

After nearly a decade of dating, I realised I had become very good at going on dates. Unfortunately, this did not mean I had become particularly good at dating.

If I found someone attractive enough, I could become remarkably creative about his potential. I spent far too much time wondering whether a man liked me without stopping to consider whether I even wanted him.

So I created Finding My Husband .

Part dating journal, part game and part much-needed reality check, this book is for women who want to keep their heads when chemistry starts doing suspicious things to their judgement.

Before you start assessing the men, you'll work out what you're actually looking for. Your non-negotiables, preferences, dealbreakers, the kind of life you want and how you want a relationship to feel. Then you can start collecting evidence.

Each man becomes a Candidate. Each date gets reviewed.

• Collect green flags.
• Investigate the yellow ones.
• Lose hearts for bad behaviour.
• Send failed candidates to The Graveyard.

You'll keep track of how you feel around someone, whether his words match his behaviour, whether your lives are actually compatible and whether you're falling for the man in front of you or the potential you've assigned to him.

There are also checks for those particularly dangerous moments when you really like someone and your judgement becomes… flexible.

And because the man isn't always the problem, there's an entire section devoted to you. Are you ignoring things because you're attracted to him? Searching for problems because closeness scares you? Confusing anxiety with chemistry? Trying to earn his affection? Or simply more interested in being chosen than in choosing?

Finding My Husband won't tell you who to date. It gives you somewhere to record what actually happened, notice your patterns and work out what you think before your group chat gets involved.

Because you get a vote too.

Publisher - BookVAULT Publishing

Language - English

Perfect Bound

Contributors

By author

Chantal Spies

Published Date - 2026-09-20

ISBN - 9781808973833

Dimensions - 27.9 x 21.6 x 0.4 cm

Page Count - 72